Set Free

There are so many things that I've been healed from this past week and a half. There are so many things that I've learned. But not thru humans, although they were used to bring me to the point where I was open to the learning. It was thru God and Him alone, that I was set free. I walk in that freedom.

I have learned that it is okay to cry. Growing up I learned that if I cried, it would show I am weak and beatings would follow along with ridicule and hateful words. I see now that crying releases emotions, good and bad ones. Crying is needed when words fail to show depth. I weep openly now, I weep with joy, with sorrow and with anger.

I now see that the enemy had distracted me from my devotional time with God, thus leading me to the dark place that I was. I had no time with God, so I perceived Him to have left me. I thought God had PUT ME in that dark place because I was bad or because it was a test. I see now it was the enemy. I get to trample the enemy under my feet now because a Prophet of The Lord had spoke the Truth over me and the Truth sets me FREE. Now I MAKE time to be with my Lord, whether it is on break at work or in the early morning before everyone else is up.
I am learning it is okay to go to others for help and to verbally say I need their help. That one was the hardest for me: to trust someone enough to state you are not strong enough to do something and are trusting them to help you. But that is one that is still a work in progress.

I see now that God loves me. It isn't human love and conditional. He LOVES me. He BLED for me. He waits patiently for me to come to me. When I came to Him on my knees on that third night of the conferences, He rejoiced and poured His Spirit on me. I sang in the language of angels. My heart exploded. He shared a taste of the burden He has for His Church, that He has for me. To feel what He feels, just a fraction of it, it blows my mind still. To see myself as He does for those fleeting moments, how I wish I could draw! My beloved... He calls me His ♥

I am set free from the lies that were spoken over me for over 10 years to the present. No, all of them aren't gone. But the ones that are frees me to dance with abandon, to worship with the flag and with my voice and with my pencil. I can walk knowing I am His. No, I do not know what all that entails. But I know I am His Beloved, His Bride. He loves me. And no man on this Earth (except for Jesus when He comes) can take that away from me.

I Will Rise

I have learned a lot in this past week, about myself and about God. God has a way of taking something you are hiding from the world and bringing it into the light for you to overcome. I know now that God doesn't want this for me. He didn't plan this. This isn't something I have to go through because I was a bad kid or something God has planned to test me. No, those are lies. This is something the enemy is doing. Satan may be using it in hopes I fall into sin, in hopes I turn from God, in hopes I commit suicide. But God, my Daddy, my Saviour!, is going to use it for good. I do not know what that looks like in the longrun. Right now I see how He is using it to help me overcome my fears: my fear of leaning on people, my fear of asking for help, my fear of letting people see the skeletons in my closet, my fear of crying. God is using it to help me get DEEPER into Him. I am learning so much about my Daddy during this time. I am learning more about my spiritual giftings. I am STILL ALIVE and walking with Jesus. To God be the glory. And thanks be to those who are His Children who are (thankfully) yielded to God and His Spirit and were able to come alongside me during these past 5 months and help me stay on the narrow road. My Spiritual parents do not have a Facebook. But to my other spiritual parents, Shawn and Stacey, and to my brother and sister Chris and Michelle, thank you. Thank you for hearing God's voice and being a vessel for Him to flow thru you, to use the giftings He has given you to reach me during these past 5 months. You are such beautiful people. Jesus reigns and the fire can either consume or refine... may I be refined 'to be more beautiful than the tanzanite'.

What is YOUR Bible saying?

When I was younger and naive (miss those days sometimes), I would hear my Pape say someone was a Christian, Catholic or Jew and I would instantly think, "Oh they are different. I can hang out with them! They don't do bad things!" And that is how it would go throughout my younger days up until I was in high school. Then I entered high school and saw these "Christians" drinking, smoking, carrying a baby, getting an abortion, being as bad as the "unsaved" people. To think I believed someone being a Christian or Catholic made them a good person. THIS IS HOW IT IS! It ISN'T to be this way! What happened to allowing the Spirit to move in us and to convict us of living a righteous life, pleasing to the Lord?!? Church, wake up! WE ARE THE BIBLE THE WORLD IS READING!!! If people are not going to read the Bible, our job as Followers of Christ, is to reflect the Bible and the wonderful life we have since we've accepted Christ. It bothers me to let people know I am a Christian and their face reflects disdain, disgust, a look of hatred or boredom. People should be joyful, asking us what to do to receive Christ. Being a Christian is not a label we wear on Sundays as we go through the motions and then we spend the rest of the week in our old (present) sins, that is throwing manure into the face of the man who died FOR US! Christ ended all of that when He died for us. We are to let the Spirit in us convict us and help us turn away from our flesh and fix our eyes on Him! Do not shame Christ! We are the Bible the world is reading... what is YOUR Bible saying? 

Not of this world

All my life I haven't fit in anywhere. Since I have been saved almost 1 year ago (Sept 12th) even more so. I know in my church and among fellow Christians, I do not fit in. I am not satisfied with teaching on just Jesus and His death and resurrection. I believe in teaching on the Holy Spirit that raised Him from the dead, the Spirit that now lives in us and gives us the authority to raise the dead, heal the sick. The Spirit that allows us receive visions and spiritual gifts. Because I am a "Holy roller", "nut case", "Pentecostal" and "Charismatic" (just to name a few of the things I have been called) and because I believe in pursuing, learning and teaching these things, I do not fit in. Because I cannot worship in the "right" way, cannot just stand there and cannot sing songs without singing in the language of angels, I do not fit in. I do not believe in being content with only part of the Scriptures and only teaching parts of the Good News. Yes, it gets me into trouble. Yes, it is a lonely place to walk. Jesus got into trouble and His walk was with few. He saved all of mankind if we would only receive it. I believe I am in good company, no? I have my spiritual parents who believe in pursuing what I am. I am seeking revival. If that leaves me as one who doesn't fit in, I believe it is a worthy sacrifice to follow in the steps of my Saviour.

Hard Look Into the Still Waters

I apologize if this note lacks my normal eloquence and structure.

As I watch my fellow brothers and sisters in Chris fall to the things of this world and watch their walk with God and their spirits decay, I have literally weeped and I have felt such an anger and irritation in my heart. The Body of God today seems so blind to the control the enemy has over them when they fall into the ways of the world. 

Why is no one teaching on this in church?

Your pastors may not teach you on the enemy and spiritual warfare. Your pastor may not teach you about avoiding the ways of the world and walking on the narrow road. Your pastor may not come alongside you and ask you how your walk is with God. But it IS in the Bible. 

Please, learn to guard yourself against backsliding and falling into the ways of the world. We are called to be different and "outside of the world" if you will (John 15:16).

We are to set our minds and eyes on things above, things that are of God. We are to yearn for God, for Heaven, for the spiritual things which will satisfy, unlike things of this world that satisfy temporairly and, usually, with consequence (Colossians 3:1-3). 

When we allow ourselves to fall into the things of the world, we are starving our spirits that yearn for God and the Spirit. When we know Jesus and are devoted to Him then fall into the world and completely turn from our faith, we are worse off than we were before we knew Him. We beome worse off than before because we knew freedom yet in the end we chose to be in bondage again (2 Corinthians 11:3; 2 Peter 2:20-22).

If no one else has told you then I shall.

Guard yourself from the ways of this world. Make a covenant with your eyes (Job 31:1), guard your mouth (James 1:26; Ephesians 4:29). Live your life in a pure lifestyle so you can come before God with no guilt (Psalm 26:6). 

If you do not feel anger or wish to walk away from anything that is not building up your life or is pleasing to God (cussing, immoral TV or music, your own actions) I beg of you to check your heart and where you are with God.

If you know this is you, God wants you to turn back to Him and it is repeated multiple times (James 4:8). God is ever so clear in scripture from the beginning to the end of the Holy Book where you stand when you turn away from Him knowingly (Hebrew 10:26-29; Luke 9:62; James 4:17).

God asks you in Galatians 5:7 who made you turn from the truth? Are you able to look and see who is is? If you are able to, are you willing to choose God and walk away from those who make you stray?

Galatians 6:1-2 commands us to hold one another accountable. So I write this not to be harsh on any reader or to cause anyone to feel shame. We all come up short from what we know we can be in our walk. Proverbs 27:17 declares that we sharpen one another as iron sharpens iron. Let us all come to one another, gently, pointing out sin or backsliding. Let us pray together. And let us, as a body, be not of this world and be followers of Christ. 

Psalm-ish Writing

Oh, my God, how log will You withhold Yourself from me? My soul longs for Your embrace and Spirit as the moon longs for the night. My cries echo thru the land and rise to the Heavens yet You hide Your Spirit from me. My God! Answer my cries! The enemy looms near, look how he watches my move, my God. His followers loom alongside, waiting for me to trip. Lord, I am already fallen. Please, do not hesitate in saving me. I reach for You, my Love. Trample my enemies, crush them, oh God. Save me, my Lord. I need You. No person, no not even my spiritual parents, can satisfy my soul like Your Presence can. Oh, Daddy, come quickly and save me. I cry out to Thee.... 

In Your Arms

I see Your smile as I close my eyes
Feel Your arms around me tight
I rest here knowing You love me
Knowing one day You'll set me free
I find joy in the dreams You create
Find wonder when You show me fate
As You take my mind away from the world
I forget about what makes my heart so cold
It is in my mind that I find my true peace
It's there in Our meadow where You and I meet

"I've never stopped loving you, Daughter."

I am the type of person that when things get overwhelming I leave the area or disappear into writing and music. But since Sunday morning, I haven't had the chance to run away from the things challenging my heart, challenging my limits, the things breaking down my walls and barriers... because God is the one who is allowing it to happen.

Those who know me outside of church and Wednesday prayer know a different girl than what I show in front of my congregation. I am a girl who is nervous about letting people too close. I dislike large groups and always know where my escape routes are. I do not like being touched unless I make the move first. I do not like people to know the girl under the blood of Christ.

You can know the side of me that adores Abba, the girl who dances and loves to sing her own love songs to Him.

But you CANNOT know the girl I was and still am before God.

Abba decided to challenge that by letting me get so lost and down to rock bottom so that I would HAVE to let people see who I am so I could break the chains that kept me on the roller coaster of love and despair, life and death, freedom and bondage.

The details, circumstances and people involved are between them, me and Abba alone.

The results and lessons are for everyone...

My old self that I still kept inside, unknowingly, believed that I wasn't worth being loved and that every mistake I made was making God move away from me and not love me anymore. As a result, I felt shame and guilt and moved away from God, my source of strength and hope. 

Every time I would sin due to the shame, guilt and feeling that God didn't love me, I wasn't forgiving myself for doing those things, even though those who were involved were trying to tell me that He does love me and has forgiven me already. 

You see, as a new Christian, most of my walk has been experiences with God, not Biblical knowledge. So, to me, God and His love is like our love that we have for each other, dependent on emotions and what the other one does. 

THIS is why I believe every new Christian should have a mentor/teacher of sorts during their early walk. It is SO easy to view God as human love. 

God is love and love is God.

God forgives and forgets every sin... we have to learn to forgive ourselves (which I've thankfully done, both present and past ones).

I am like the adulteress. I was thrown down at the feet of Jesus, in my shame and guilt, looking up at Him, begging Him to forgive me, to not beat me... to love me again. 

When I think of that I can hear Him say to me, "I've never stopped loving you. Let Me hold you. Sin no more and live in Me."

Untitled Poem

They say you are an inspiration

They say you are so full of light

But they can't see your depression

That you are in a spiritual fight

All they see is your smile

As you lift your voice to sing

As you drift away for awhile

As, for a moment, you can breathe

They cannot see the fear

They cannot see the pain

You won't ever shed a tear

Won't let them see the chains

The shadows are still there

Their whispers in your mind

Strangers lay your soul bare

Even they are just as blind

Momentary freedom, just a taste

Your cry fades in the night

Sent back to this dark place

Back to bear this unending plight

You lie in bed, Bible against your chest

You wonder why this is your life

Called an inspiration, blessed

They don't see this strife

His screams are in your ears

As you pray the voices scream

Please, Lord, ease my fears

Tell me this is just a dream

Being Silent Isn't One of Them

I've having a lot of dreams since last Sunday, hence my many blogs since then. Last night's dream has influenced this blog:

I was in a dark room; I believe our church's sanctuary because I can recall the three stained glass pieces on our stage and the hole in the roof above. There were many people in our church, listening to a guy in black with red eyes, preaching on the stage. I was frantically trying to shout, warn them that he was a false shepherd, a great deceiver but I was mute. He looked at me and I heard his laughter in my mind. Then I woke up.

This dream confirms the emotions I have been feeling and also my great desire to teach people the truths we are not taught.

I know many look down upon me for being young, both in my years since birth and months in my salvation. What angers me is that the little children, knowing I am so young in my walk with God, come to me, asking me to teach them how to anoint rooms and themselves, how to rebuke demons, wind and storms. They ask me how I hear God, how I have visions and dreams. Yet it is the adults who look at me with disdain. It is so frustrating!

2 Timothy 4:12! I even have a shirt that has it written. Do not look down upon me for being young! See me as an example to all believers!

So many of us are not taught the truth of the Spirit. We are not taught of the spiritual gifts, of spiritual quickening, of demonic oppression and possession. We are only told that the enemy is there. We know this! We should be taught in recognizing the signs of oppression and how to rebuke it and then retain the freedom!

We are commanded to be many things. We are to love one another as He loves us. We are to lay up our treasures in Heaven, not on Earth. Pray for those who persecute you. Honor our parents. Be born again. Await His return. Beware of false teachings.

We were never told to be silent.

I love my God. I adore Him. Yes, I am young in Him and in my years since birth. But I love Him. I love my Christ siblings and my spiritual parents. I want to lead the children to Him.

I cannot be silent about God and I cannot be silent about the truths that are not taught openly. We are told to be free and be His children. How can we be free when we are fearful? How can we be free if we do not know we are to be free? 

This is what I teach and try to be an example of. And I will not be silent.

The Silent Poison

If you were to go back to my high school and ask the teachers what kind of student I was, most would tell you I was a quiet, shy yet advanced student. Some might even tell you I was to graduate at the age of 15, though few in the high school knew that.

If you asked them why I was so quiet, they wouldn't have an answer for you, unless they still had the work I did in English class. Behind the stanzas and lyrical paragraphs, the truth was revealed, to those who knew how to read metaphors, similes, and paradoxes. 

If you asked them what I was passionate about, their faces would light up. They would go on this  huge tirade of words, praising me for my passions: writing, attempting to form groups against bullying, attempting to form some kind of students counseling other students organization, attempting to form a way to work in the town. They would say how my passion was helping people and writing. 

See, I was this quiet girl in school. I've always been quiet, on the sidelines looking in. I remember one English teacher teasing me, calling me a stray animal who had lost its trust in humans. I wanted to run to them and be accepted yet I was fearful so I stayed on the outside and just looked in.

She couldn't have been more right.

When I was in school and even up to now I have always been able to look at someone and be able to read them. The eyes say a lot. Posture and patterns only confirm what the eyes betray, hence my always painting my eyes black in school and not making eye contact up til today. 

What I saw in the eyes of those kids and what I see in the eyes of people today breaks my heart.

There is a silent poison in people that no one can see or they choose not to see... abuse...

When people say the word abuse, they think of just physical abuse. They picture a husband beating their wife, a boyfriend controlling his girlfriend with the threat of beating her. If your boyfriend or father hits you in the midst of a fight, do you just take it and tell yourself that he didn't mean it? Or do you stop and think if he did it in the midst of anger, it can happen again?

Few people think of sexual abuse, whether it is molestation, forcing a girlfriend/wife to give a boyfriend/husband something they do not wish to.

How many people think of emotional, verbal or mental abuse? 

If your parents, friends or significant other call you fat, worthless, dumb, a disappointment, do you think it is abuse? If it is constant, if it causes you to hurt and you start to view yourself as that, it is abuse. Some people call it bullying... and that is a form of abuse. This is verbal abuse.

If those same people were to toy with your emotions, lift you up with words of praise and then take it back and say something negative, that is emotional abuse. Emotional abuse can be tied to verbal abuse as well. Both of these can lead to mental abuse.

Mental abuse can literally change the way an individual views them-self and the world and people around them. It can leave one in a state of depression and can lead to many mental disorders and anxiety. 

This is the silent poison...

All of the above are things that I have encountered first hand and have experienced for over a decade. Less then 10 people knew thing before I typed this blog. Less than 5 actually know the details and how bad it was/is. 

This is what I am passionate about. Abuse is everywhere! It is in the workplace, in families, in schools, in churches. 

When I went to South Dakota, it re-broke my heart. I had night-terrors reliving my past and some of the abuses I went through. That mission trip re-solidified in my mind that there needs to be a way to stop this or provide some form of counseling or safe-house for children and young adults to go to and escape. 

What am I passionate about?, you ask the teachers.

All I want to do is a make a difference. 

Nothing to lose, Eternity to gain

These thoughts came upon my mind today while listening to Jesus Culture and letting my mind wander. It is the same thing I wanted to speak when we came back from South Dakota while we were giving testimonies but it wasn't my place to speak.

Abba has impressed on my heart how crucial freedom from this world is for a Christian. In church we go through the motions of what is appropriate for that church. If we feel the need to dance or jump around or sing in tongues, we do so haltingly, wondering what others will think. In our homes, if we are the only Christian, we hesitate in bringing out our Bibles or playing worship music, wondering what our parents or siblings will think. In work, we hesitate in sharing details of our mission, wondering what others will say, what if they call me a freak. Among fellow Christian friends, we wonder if we are the only one who can do this or that and we feel a burden to them for wanting to talk only about God and His works.

We fear being persecuted, but for what reason?

What is the worst they can do to us?

Our pastors can be mad at us for moving the pews and altars so we have room to dance, jump around. They can be mad that we sing out in tongues and randomly go up to others to pray. The worst they can do is tell us no and if we continue to do Abba's will the worst they can do is tell us to leave. There are hundreds of churches and our Church family understands and will interject and love us.

They can call us names and beat us but God's Agape love will rise up in us making us feel compassion for them.

They can kick us out of our home, job, college, etc. but we have fellow Christ family members who will gladly open their homes to us and help us find a new job, a new college, a supporting family we can grow in.

They can kill us, either by accident as they are beating us or on purpose for coming into their country sharing God but what will that do? We get to sit at the feet of our Father praising Him for eternity!

Abba has impressed this on my heart, even more so, because of events that have been happening since I came home from my mission in South Dakota. The oppression and persecution has grown ten times since I have been home. And I will say it: knowing I have my spiritual parents to go to, knowing that I still have Abba, yes it is what is keeping me from giving into the voices and dreams. Like Chris P said, it is demonic. I will say it, it still hurts. It makes me weep and wonder why it must be this way for me right now. But I know that I can go to my spiritual parents or to Chris and his wife.

With this life, I have nothing lose... only eternity to gain.

Poem of the Unknown

This will be the worst poem I've ever written. It is a poem I wrote on September 12th, 2012, when I was saved. I was originally going to send it to my spiritual mother but it still sits, in my email drafts. It was meant to show her who I was, who I still was, even after accepting Christ, what the enemy will use to break me. After my baptism, it became clear I needed to let it out into the open. And now after South Dakota, I know unless others know, it will be the enemy's weapon against me. 

Never raised with a source of light

Each day, living became a fight

Take each blow and wait for the end

Watch all this blood flow to the bed

“You’re nothing, no one will love you”

Use Mom’s makeup, cover the black and blue

Smile, pretend it is completely fine

Long sleeves, no one sees the red lines

She has a knife, look at his throat

Pills, alcohol, steel… my way to cope

Hide in the corner, eyes made black

Perfect GPA, smiles, great false mask

Fourteen days behind these bars

So stupid, they found the scars

Come back out, ready for the end

Bottle of Aleve, I’m alive, so stupid

Graduate and no one knows the real me

People look but I won’t let them see

I’m just a simple broken girl

I’m lost, unloved, don’t belong in this world

Persecute Me

This is a long blog on my faith.

Few people know me since I've graduated high school in 2009. Those from my church know me best. Only my close friends know that I was saved September 12th, 2012. I have been clean from my old ways (cutting, self-harm, suicidal attempts, anorexia, pill-popping) since September 21st, 2012. Even fewer people know how I am since I've been baptized on April 28th 2013. I can count on one hand the people who truly know how I am currently, how much It burns inside. This blog is going to be uncensored, raw and full of tears.

So many people in church, since the day I was saved, have told me how awesome I am, how spiritually mature I am, how in love with God I am. I would always shake my head and shrug it off. Because only I knew the truth. The only time I would experience God would be in church. The only time I would feel God outside of church is if I was with Cheri and Don (who later because my spiritual parents). No matter what I did, I couldn't get close to God. I had no idea why.

My walk with God was like walking on glass. I would constantly struggle, with trying to see Him, with spiritual attacks, with my old self wanting my old ways. I asked my one Christian friend "Is this all that being a Christian is? Fighting old ways and failing?"

I didn't see the point in it. If God was so great, why was I suffering so much? Why did I still hurt, still GET hurt and feel worthless? Where was the joy and peace I was to encounter? Where was God?

Everyday in church I would go thru the motions and sing the songs. But there were just words. One Christian song words it well, how I viewed singing and church. "I guess I thought that I had figured You out. I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about how You were mighty to save. Those were only empty words on a page." (Addison Road, What do I know of Holy)

All the talk of grace, of peace, of love and freedom... I took it as a personal attack and blow to my heart because I had anything BUT that. I was still a tortured soul wondering when I would be free and happy like all of those around me.

I wanted to stand up and scream, "If this is all true then why is Satan still winning?!?"

Everything seemed to be against me. My dad lost his job. I almost got raped at a Halloween party at my church. Just when I thought I would break on November 29th, my family got a phone call: my Pape had a stroke and wasn't responding.

When I got to the hospital with my folks, my Pape wasn't even there with us in reality. He was screaming in pain. To condense it, my friend Brody and his Mom came out to the hospital and stayed with me, awake, all night until 7am. They told us he was stable and we could go home to sleep. At 10:26am my Pape died. The odd thing was I felt nothing but peace until I got to the room where he was. I sank into a deep depression yet my heart was changed because I experienced, even though so brief, the peace people spoke of.

After that I tried everything to experience it again. I got word of a mission trip to Kentucky to a girl's group home in December. I went and everything changed.

I was able to help a young girl accept Christ into her life. As she did that, I re-dedicated my life to Him. I literally heard Him say, "This is my Daughter and I am so fond of her."

After we got back, everything clicked. I found Christian Leadership University. Abba led me to ask Don and Cheri to be my mentors for college... with that they have become my spiritual parents. I learned how to two-way journal to talk with God. I began having visions which at first scared the crap out of me.

Now for the event which has completely changed me...

I just recently (June 14-22) got back from a mission trip to South Dakota to Pine Ridge Reservation. While I was out there we had church service where we all experienced the Holy Spirit and had healings of the heart. While it was occurring, I couldn't talk to anyone, all I could do was weep and shake. After service ended, I went to Cheri, stuttering and unable to form words. She laughed and held me, praying in the Spirit and Abba spoke to me, begging me to rid myself of fear and trust Him. I began speaking in tongues, with Cheri. After that He gave me the power to make storms move away and the wind to cease. He gave me the power to cast a demon out of a guy. He gave me the ability to show others how to anoint in His name and make miracles happen using His name. All of this I did using His name.

Since then I have found myself no longer fearful. I am not afraid of what Abba gives me, in the sense of gifts. I now dance and sing with abandon for Him. I read my Bible in front of my co-workers and my parents. I am speaking of God to my parents. Anyone who knows me knows how afraid I am of being judged, of being yelled at, of losing my relationship with my parents.

I was given the chance to speak on Sunday at church about my experiences in South Dakota. As this note shows, I cannot even come close to wording it. How do you explain the secret place? How do you explain speaking in tongues, having visions, making storms move in the name of Jesus Christ?

All I know is this:

I will not settle for less than what I know can  and WILL be mine. I know my parents will be saved. I know what freedom tastes like. I know what I can do with the name of Jesus Christ as my strength. I refuse to sit back and be idle. He has erased my fear. He has gifted me, a girl who used to cut, attempt suicide, be depressed and be abused for 13 years and mock the name of God, He has gifted me so deeply. I can never thank Him enough. Maybe surrending my life to His will might come close.

Am I still scared? Yes, I am scared to death. But there is a peace in me, a fire burning that is relentless until I just act. Am I scared of what my dad will do to me? Yes. Am I scared of being without friends and family? More than ever. But I know if I am to die for my faith or if I am to be alone on the streets because I cannot be silent about God, I know He will be there with me, holding me in His arms like He is right now as I sit here in my room crying, writing this.

To those who read this and laugh... I say persecute me. In the end, I have eternity with God and I CANNOT be silenced.

To Chris Pick, thank you for praying with me after church Sunday for peace. I will message you sometime with an update.

To Michelle Pick, thank you for being my Mom figure at Pine Ridge. Your presence was a comfort.

To Cheri and Don, though they will never see this, thank you for being a strong conduit for God to speak thru you to me. For being parents to me... I am unable to go to mine. I don't call you Mom and Dad just because... I view you guys as my parents.

To Cheri, especially, thank you for the hours of praying over me. You mean more to me than you will ever know.